If you are a parent of a minor child, this is probably the hardest question for you to answer. \u00a0Who will you name as guardian for your children if you should die? Like me, it may be the reason you\u2019ve held off on updating your will.\u00a0 As I mentioned in my previous post, I had a hard time facing this particular task.<\/p>\n
Deciding who would take care of Luke was, by far, our largest concern and an emotional one, at that!\u00a0 Jeff and I spent lots of time discussing our options.\u00a0\u00a0 My best advice here is to be open, honest and keep the discussion going.\u00a0 Admit that none of your best friends, family members or anyone else will ever be able to be you.\u00a0 So stop looking for someone that would do everything just like you would.\u00a0 Once I recognized that, I found we had a whole list of potential candidates.\u00a0 People who would love and care for Luke.<\/p>\n
Here are some things to consider that I hope will help you choose a guardian you are comfortable with for your child in the unlikely event that you die.<\/p>\n
Start with a list of potential candidates.\u00a0 Remember, there is no rule that the guardian has to be blood related.\u00a0\u00a0 Consider close friends, anyone close to you and already involved in your family\u2019s life.<\/p>\n
There are lots of things to consider in naming a guardian.\u00a0 Location for one, would your child have to move?\u00a0 Would they be uprooted from everything they know?\u00a0 Depending on how old they are this may matter more.\u00a0 One of our big concerns is ensuring that Luke is able to stay connected to and spend time with both sides of the family.\u00a0\u00a0 Choosing someone with similar values to us is also extremely important, especially in the areas of faith, family, education, and ethics.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t be afraid to talk to someone you\u2019re considering for guardianship. \u00a0\u00a0Are they even willing and able to take on guardianship responsibilities? \u00a0Talk about some of your concerns.\u00a0 Ask more about their views on education, faith, and other family values.\u00a0 Ask them about their willingness to make sacrifices.\u00a0 Are they willing to make the effort to take your child to see the other side of their family, even on holidays?\u00a0 Most importantly, spending time with the potential guardian(s) will help you see how they interact with your child.<\/p>\n
Remember, you can always change your designation down the road as life changes.\u00a0 Although, one of Jeff\u2019s older children may want to raise Luke should something happen to Jeff and I; they\u2019re all just getting started in life. It would be a huge responsibility to take on at this stage of their lives, something we\u2019re not entirely comfortable with. \u00a0Of course, over time that may change.\u00a0 Choose someone that makes sense right now.\u00a0 As your child ages you may want to change the guardianship designation to better fit their needs.\u00a0 In fact, it\u2019s a good idea to periodically review your guardianship designation to make sure your choice still aligns with your desires.<\/p>\n
You may even want to consider your own child\u2019s input.\u00a0 If your child is old enough to understand the concept, you may want to involve them in the discussion.\u00a0 I remember having the discussion with my parents as an adolescent and I was glad to be apart of the conversation.\u00a0 It made me feel comfortable with the decision.<\/p>\n
If you have a number of minor children, you may even consider choosing different guardians for specific children.\u00a0 Growing up we were lucky to have our extended family nearby, which enabled my parents to chose one set of guardians for my older brother and I then another set for my younger sister and brother.\u00a0 Should my parents have died, although we would have been split up, we would have each had another sibling with us, still lived very close to each other, and been raised in a family with similarly aged children.<\/p>\n
Additionally, it\u2019s a good idea to name a contingent guardian should your original selection be unable to take on the role for some reason.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t let concern over the chosen guardian\u2019s financial situation deter you from choosing someone that would otherwise be suitable.\u00a0\u00a0 If you are concerned that they won\u2019t manage money appropriately for your child you can designate someone else to handle the financial aspects.\u00a0 If you\u2019re concerned that they won\u2019t have the financial resources to take on raising and educating your child, you can supplement with life insurance or other assets.\u00a0 In my opinion, there are lots of ways to handle financial concerns. Choosing someone with character, similar values and most importantly the capacity to love and care for your child is what matters most in this decision.<\/p>\n
Finally, remember an imperfect decision is still better than no decision.\u00a0 Don\u2019t leave the decision to the court and a judge who doesn\u2019t know you to decide what\u2019s best for your child.\u00a0 Additionally, if you are a single parent with sole custody it is all the more important that you have guardianship designation in place.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m happy to say that after taking into account all of these considerations, we were able to narrow down our list of potential guardians and come up with both a primary guardian and a contingent guardian for Luke that we are both comfortable with and fits our situation right now.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
If you are a parent of a minor child, this is probably the hardest question for you to answer. \u00a0Who will you name as guardian for your children if you should die? Like me, it may be the reason you\u2019ve held off on updating your will.\u00a0 As I mentioned in my previous post, I had […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":455,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","sharing_disabled":false,"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[41,18],"tags":[49,48,50,42],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/family-walk.jpg","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9rIpx-7g","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/450"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=450"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/450\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":454,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/450\/revisions\/454"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/455"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=450"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=450"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sarahcarrfinancial.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=450"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}